Today on the Who Gives a Shit Channel...

Welcome to the Who Gives a Shit Channel, where we cover all the insipid and meaningless top news stories that nobody should care about. Our top story today is the outrage over Miley Cyrus' Vanity Fair photo. Oh no, they showed a 15 year old's back! Child porn! Child porn! Disney is certain to go bankrupt over this scandal. If they wanted something vanilla and boring, perhaps Sears Portrait Studio would have been better than Annie Leibovitz. Next up is Reverend Wright. There are enough people of every race and political persuasion who are outspoken and angry about something that chances are everybody knows somebody like that. I hope nobody I know ever runs for president and has to waste time with questions about my blog. And possibly the most irrelevant story all day is that Bush is speaking about the economy sometime today. The best thing he could do now is just not to do anything. At least then whatever is wrong can't get any worse. As a reward for slogging your way through three very boring and tedious bits of non-news, here's a whole batch of headlines about a sensational story full of depraved sex and human misery.